Limbo

“ Inside your head the sound of glass,

a car crash sound as the trucks roll over and explode in slow motion.

Hello darling, sorry about that.

Sorry about the bony elbows, sorry we

lived here, sorry about the scene at the bottom of the stairwell

and how I ruined everything by saying it out loud.

Especially that, but I should have known.

You see, I take the parts that I remember and stitch them back together

to make a creature that will do what I say

or love me back. ”

Richard Siken

“Limbo” is an ongoing collection of pieced together imagery, snapshots of thoughts and remnants of long locked away memories. Postcards and pictures are some of the only remnants left of what used to be my family, of how I used to be a whole person. I am a textbook trauma case; struggling with both real and imagined fear of abandonment, idealizing and devaluing everyone I’ve ever loved, and constantly feeling empty all at the same time. My identity is trauma informed; it’s a constant limbo between remembering and forgetting, hatred and love, loss and gain. Often I feel as if I am teetering on the edge, and I can liken this to my borderline experience.

The photos I’ve created are meant to emanate the sense of loneliness, isolation, and lack of identity I often struggle with, through snapshots of me, people close to me, and places I frequent.